Twas the night before funding, all through the leased house

Joe Milam
2 min readDec 21, 2021

Not a coder was coding, not moving a mouse;

The term sheet was posted on the white board with care,

In hopes that ‘Dead Presidents’ soon would list there;

The C Suite were nestled all snug in their Aerons,

While visions of bonuses danced in their neurons,

And chairman in her kerchief, and I in my (backwards) cap,

Had just settled down for a long evening’s nap,

When out of the laptop there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the futon to see what was the matter.

Away to the keyboard, I flew like a flash,

Tore open the emails to look for the cash,

The meme of a ‘$’ gave off a bright glow,

And gave the upcoming payroll a green light to ‘Go’,

When what to my wondering eyes should appear,

But a list of signed docs, from eight VCs..’first tier’,

With an excited lead funder, so lively and real,

I knew in a moment it must be St. Thiel.

More rapid than eagles his syndicate they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

“Now, Menlo! Now, Atlas! Now, First Round And Venrock!

On, Benchmark! On Canaan! On, Tiger And Greylock!

To the top of the Cap table! to the top of the water-fall! Wire cash away! Cash away! Cash away all!”

Merry Christmas to all! And to all a good night!



Joe Milam

Multi-family office originally at 3000 Sand Hill, mid-wife to Band of Angels, now looking to mobilize ‘legacy angels’ into the ecosystem.